Master's the Death of this Blog

I have not forgotten this dear blog that I love to update, but this Master's Degree is killing any and all "extra" time I have, which is not much.  I will post Halloween pics and other Hill boy happenings soon...real soon...

The Man that Excused Himself from the Table

1 John 4:7-21  God is Love

Last weekend we celebrated three wonderful people, my cousin and his marriage to a beautiful lady, Ryker’s Birthday, and also the birthday of my Grandpa who turned 85.  Traveling to this family event, I was excited to see my family, aunts, uncles, cousins that I hadn't seen since my Grandma’s funeral.  I was looking forward to a happy event.  What surprised me more than anything, is that while there, I learned a very important lesson, a lesson I believe came straight from Christ.  This lesson I learned, was one I thought I knew well and understood perfectly, it was the lesson of Love.  But this time it was different, it had a deeper more passionate meaning, one I was shocked to learn over the weekend. 

I learned that God’s Love will always have an overwhelming impact on not only those of us that know Him, but on those that spend a lifetime trying to avoid it. 

My grandpa celebrated his 85^th birthday on August 22^nd, this birthday was different, this birthday was missing someone, his wife, my grandma.   A little background on these two from my perspective growing up…  Grandpa was rarely around for his kids as they grew up, this is a well-known and talked about subject among his kids, and grandkids.  As I got older, I noticed that he would always head out to his shop when family arrived.  While we sat at my grandparents dinner table, laughing, talking, and being totally in love with my Grandma’s every word, Grandpa was never there.  I never understood why he did this, it was obvious from the smile and hug he would greet us with, that he loved us, but why did he always disappear? 

After this weekend, I think I just might have the answer to that question.  I noticed a different side to this man.  I watched him watch his family with a smile.  I saw him sitting at the dinner table surrounded by his family, laughing, talking, and him being totally in love with their every word.  As we sang Happy Birthday to this man of little emotion, I watched as he cried, not because he was sad, but because he was loved.  This got me thinking, maybe just maybe he excused himself from that dinner table so many times in the past because he knew that my Grandma with her kind words and gentle smile would and could teach his children and grandchildren what love was, what it meant to be faithful to Christ-something he was never taught to do, something he was not raised to do.  He knew she had a gift of teaching us how to love, and maybe his gift was to let her.

I think that the tears he shed were because he once again was surrounded by the love that could only come from one lady, his wife.   He could feel her presences in us, her love in us.  A man that spent his life avoiding emotions, was now overcome with the love of his family, a love that comes from God. 

I wonder if we as a Christian family, a family that has been taught by the ultimate teacher of love- Do we make the lost feel overcome with love when we are with them?  Do we love like Jesus loved?  Can they see and feel Christ’s love in us, from us.  Do we leave them with an emotion that for so long, they have tried to avoid?  When we leave them, are they now in the presence of God’s Love?

As a mother, I learned from my Grandma the importance of loving each other, taking care of each other, and living my life faithfully.   But who would have thought that I would have learned a much greater meaning and desire of God’s Love from the man who excused himself from the table.

1 John 4:7-21  God is Love

New Found Love and a few Kid Pics!

Well, I have found my new love, baby blanket cakes.  I love love love making these.  What a stress reliever.  And I just love it when I get to decorate them in pink. 

I will be posting wonderful summer happenings at the Hill house soon.  We have been very very busy.  Here are a few pictures.

Hudsen getting ready for his baseball game...Go Tadpoles!

Ryker after a day at the pool.

Wait for it...

Can you see what I caught?

That's right, I caught the black bird that eats all of Norman's food. 
I was in the kitchen when I pulled the rope.  Snap!!!

"I can't believe he finally caught that bird."



~~Hours in our Day~~

Hello World!  Seems like this blog has become a hit or miss type of blog.  I think of it often and have little time to do much about it.  I am afraid that over the past few months I have been in a blog fog.  No real reason to blog, well other than the wonderful world of Hudsen, Gannon, and Ryker.  These guys rule my world.  They seem to dictate every move I make, every thought I consume, and every decision that I make revolves around these three little guys and this blog has not fit into their world lately.

Hudsen finished 1st grade this past week- ALL A's!!!!  What a smart guy he is.  When we started him in school we debated on whether we should start him early or late, we went with early.  Each year that has gone by, Hudsen has excelled in all he has done.  I am so proud of how much he loves learning.  Every night Hudsen would read to us.  At the beginning of this year, Hudsen knew nothing about putting letters together to make words.  Now, he is reading on a 2nd grade reading level and making 100's on his AR tests.  I thought, he we should give him a quarter for every book he read this year, then I did the math..$60.00 in quarters...sooo we went with dimes.  He made a 100% on every Spelling test he took this year and did just as well in Math.  I am so thankful for that big brain that God placed in his head!!!!
Baseball season is in full swing.  He finally moved up to Machine Pitch which he is thrilled about.  This boy is a Baseball player.  Yes, I am bragging- it's my blog, I can brag if I want to.  I am so excited to be "helping" coach his team this year.  Late nights here we come.

Gannon James-my big three year old.  He is nothing shy of being his big brother's shadow.  Everywhere Hudsen is, Gannon is also.  Everything Hudsen does, Gannon attempts.  I love hearing him say, "Ryker, just me and Hudsen, you are too little."  "You have to big like me and Hudsen."  His love is huge and his energy is amazing.  This is the kid that requires little if no sleep and has more energy than all 4 of the rest of us combined.  Levi and I are slowly discovering that Gannon requires little attention to make him happy.  We often say, have you seen Gannon in awhile?  He keeps himself completely busy all on his own.  With this new found "bigness" of his has also come a new "I can do whatever I want when I want attitude."  I am attempting to change that big attitude in that little boy.  I wonder if Hudsen was like this at 3.  I can't remember I was so occupied with baby Gannon and Levi being gone, that I honestly can't remember.  I look at Ryker and think, man I have another 3 year old to come.  Please Lord help me survive.  Terrible 3's or whatever, Gannon James is still my little man with a HUGE heart. 

Ryker Sutton, standing here screaming as I type because Gannon just took his phone away from him.  Gannon thought if he gave Ryker a "different" phone, Ryker would understand, not the case.  Ryker is not happy with Gannon right now.  Ryker has gotten big.  Saying anything and everything-as long as he is at home. In public, this kid is shy and very quiet.  He is a snuggle bug.  Sometimes I go out in public when I need a little one-on-one time with Ryker.  I find it so hard to believe that in just a few short months this little guy will be 2.  It gives me such a sick feeling in my stomach that my baby is growing so fast that I can't seem to soak it all in.  Speaking of changing, we had a major change happen last night/today.  After a year and half of bananas in this house, yesterday was Ryker's last official banana.  Before his nap yesterday we gave him a banana-nothing different- when he woke up from his nap, he had the worst rash I have ever seen.  His arms and legs looked as if he had been burnt.  After thinking about it I decided that it had to be the banana.  I am allergic to bananas and thought well so is he.  I watched him closely, gave him benadryl and sent him on his way.  He never cried, or acted as though they itched or bothered him.  This morning Levi and I noticed that they were worse and had spread.  We went straight to the Dr. and he went straight to the epi pen and steroid shot.  He then looked at me and said, you are lucky he woke up.  Well, thanks!  Sent us home with another pen and said, "Next time...Emergency Room!"  So, that was NOT fun.  Really, it amazes me how kids survive their parents sometimes.

My plate is full, actually it is overflowing right now.  I woke up a few mornings ago around 4:00 and just thought about all that I have going on right now.  I start my Masters program next week-OVERWHELMING.  I have taken on coaching duties for Hudsen's baseball team-OVERWHELMING.  I volunteered to run the concession stand at the Little League games-OVERWHELMING.  I have to attempt to take 3 active boys to the swimming pool this summer-OVERWHELMING.  I signed up to teach 3 year olds at church for the next 3 months-OVERWHELMING.  I spend 90% of my evenings talking to my husband on the phone because he works evenings-OVERWHELMING.   Trying to figure out how to spend quality time with ALL three boys daily-OVERWHELMING. 
I am such a small person in such a large world right now.  Daily I tell myself, breathe just breathe.  Why do we put so much on our plates when we know we are already to busy to do what we need to do anyway?  My answer...because we are Moms and that's what Moms do.  We just do it...get it done and then volunteer for something else. 

Tonight I pray that my life as OVERWHELMING as it seems, never gets to busy to love the people around me, that I am never to tired to hug or kiss my boys one more time, and that I ALWAYS find time to thank God for all these OVERWHELMING opportunities and blessings in my life. 


PS...A very wonderful person that has become a very dear friend lost her parents in the terrible tornadoes that went through the Oklahoma City area this past week.  Tonight and for many days and nights to come, I pray for you Lisa.  I pray that God will comfort your heart and bring peace to your life once again.  Your smile is contagious and your laughter is a sweet sound.  I hope that we see and hear that again soon. 

Reason to Celebrate

I am so lucky that I am the Mommy to these three little toads!  Thank you Hudsen, Gannon, and Ryker for letting me be your Mommy.  I love you bunches! 

I LOVE MOTHER'S DAY!

Mommy Loves you Mommy Loves you, YES I DO!

Growing Older

Today is a terribly windy day here and I am choosing not to go outside and stand in it.  So I thought I would use this time to tell you a little bit about the man I married. 
Let's be honest, before I met Levi, I was looking for someone tall, dark, and handsome.  Those were pretty much my only requirements in a man.  Levi fit those no problem.  I noticed him because of those qualities and was intrigued by them.  When we started dating I began to fall in love with him for his sense of humor, his intelligence, and his wanting to hang out with me.  He was a great guy that made me happy and I knew that he would take care of me no matter what.

Fast forward to child number one, Hudsen.  Wow, who knew this man that I fell in love with because of how handsome he was would also turn out to be such a great Daddy. 



Levi and Hudsen: Day one


As Hudsen grew, so did Levi.  He began to set new priorities for our family.  Set in our ways we were a happy family of 3. 

Then this happened...

My 2 sons



Once again Levi had a new set of responsiblities and a new outlook on life.  He was the Daddy of 2 wonderful full of energy boys.  And once again, my husband did everything in his powers to make this family of FOUR the best that it could be.   He loved us and he wanted the best for us-and he delieved....Well AND SO DID I. exhibit 3...

Daddy and boy #3



Oh my, new challenges, but never discouraged (or at least never led on) he was going to be the best Daddy of THREE that he could be.


My 3 Sons

And today, on this windy day, I am more in Love with this man not because of his hottness, which he is, but because he LOVES us more than I ever imagined possible. 
Thank you Levi for being a SUPER DADDY and a FABULOUS HUSBAND.

Love your wife,

J-

What was I thinking, Grad School? Oh MY!

Well, after a very long wait, I finally found out that I have been accepted to Graduate School, Instructional Design and Technology.  This has always been something I wanted to do, BUT now that it is here, I am scared to death.  I will be spending the next few years of my life, and my family's life, working on this degree that I have wanted for so long.  I just hope that I have enough time and energy to complete what I am about to start.  We will see how crazy I am in a few years.- Pray for Levi- he is going to need it.

Here I  We go...

Raise your hand if you have not been Sick.

I think about this blog weekly I really do, but lately, the only thing I would have to write about would be which one of us was sick this week.  Luckily for me, unlucky for my husband, it is his turn AGAIN.  Seems like we can't go a week without someone sick and feeling yucky.  I can't wait until it warms up so we can go outside and get some fresh air.  We have attempted a couple times the last week to get outside and play in the snow.  It has been way to cold.  I am ready for my summer heat to hit. 

• Today Hudsen has his last Hot Shots basketball practice.  He is a little bummed about it- HE LOVES ALL THINGS SPORTS. 
• Hudsen is doing great in school.  We were blessed with all A's on his progress report.  I told him that if he continues making A's until he graduates from High School, he could pick where he wanted to go to college.  If he started getting C's and D's, then I get to pick.  He said, "Oh great Mom, you will make me go to Texas Tech."  Looks like we will have all A's from this kid.  He is Orange and Black through and through.  (whatever works)

Gannon James, IS FINALLY POTTY TRAINED!!!  This is such a relief, only one kid in diapers.  He is so good, that he came running in a couple of nights ago screaming because he could not get his pj's off.  I am loving this.  All credit goes to his Daddy for that one. 

...side note as I am typing, I hear "why did you lock the door?"  "I guess I didn't know it was locked."  This is a conversation Levi and Hudsen are having right now over Hud locking the bathroom door- no one is in the bathroom.  Let's see how the handyman does on this one.

Ryker Sutton, So big!  He is talking up a storm.  Words we hear the most right now... "Mama" (my favorite)... "Don't" (least favorite)... "no"..."dog"... and  "this"  He walks around pointing saying "this this"  So cute.  Oh and "bottle".  Yes my 17 month old is still on a bottle.  Just keeping my baby a baby for a little longer.  I am trying I really am, but I can't imagine NOT having a baby in this house. 
I do look forward to the nights they all brush their own teeth, and get themselves ready for bed, BUT  I do love those little voices and little guys that are running around right now. 

Levi and I, well we are just trying to survive being parents of these guys.  We are doing our best to wake up each morning  NOT sick.  I think I am going to have to kick him out of our room until we are BOTH healthy. 

I am still loving my job.  The people I work with are great and so are the students.  High School kids can be very funny.  I find myself laughing all the way home about something they said or did.  I just think, oh my, I (my friends) did that same thing.  We some how survived and so will they. Just hope I can keep this in mind when my boys are in high school.  Oh that will be fun, lots of fun.
Must go Ryker is calling my name.  What Ryker wants Ryker gets. He is the boss of this house, well for now anyway.

Oh and Levi, if you read this blog before Monday...Valentine's Day is MONDAY!!!!

XOXO

HE is THREE



3 years ago today.



Today is a BIG day in the Hill house.  Today we get to celebrate Gannon's 3rd birthday.  Are you kidding me...I can't believe he is already three.  I remember so clearly waking up to a ton of snow outside wondering if we would make it to the hospital.  After a slow drive to Liberal, and an even slower wait on this little guy, he finally arrived and he has been such a joy to have in our family. 

A few of Mommy's favorite things about Gannon this year...

• Gannon says a prayer each night before supper, it goes something like this.
•  "Dear God, thank you for my tractor, my combine, the wheat dump it in the pit, thank you for my tractor my combine dump it in the pit...(repeat several times) thank you for Mommy and Daddy and Hudsen and Ryker and Mommy and Daddy and Hudsen and Ryker and GANNON... Amen. "
• Each night before Gannon can fall asleep he gives each of us Hugs, Kisses, High Fives, and Knuckles (in that order or it does not count).  He also gets up several times in the night just to tell us "Love You"  I would be a little upset about this, but his sweet little voice just brings a smile to my face and the words "I love you Gannon, to my lips" .
• Gannon has also been a huge help around the house, he unloads the dishwasher, he puts his shoes in the closet, and he can put his dirty clothes in the laundry room.  (These are huge things when so many people live in this house.)
• Gannon has learned that if you go into the bathroom and get toilet paper, you can blow your nose on it.  Love this one.  He has also informed Levi and I that he can't sleep because he has boogies.
• Gannon loves Tractors, Combines, and Wheat.  He would spend everyday at the Farm with Grandpa Kinley if we would let him.  To occupy his time and keep him up-to-date on all things farming, we let him watch combines cutting wheat on youtube.  No sound required, he just loves to watch them cut wheat and dump it in the truck.  This would provide hours of entertainment for him if we would let him watch it that long. 
• All toys containing John Deer belong to Gannon in this house, and DON"T even think about touching them Ryker and Hudsen.  "Come to think of it, don't even look at my toys."
• Gannon's favorite movies are How to Train your Dragon and Ice Age. 

This year we will be working really hard on these THREE things...

1. POTTY TRAINING (Gannon is strong willed about this and he has NO desire to learn this new trick.)
2. Counting and ABC's (Gannon is strong willed about this too, and well NO desire to learn this either.)
3. Sharing his toys (Guess what... Strong willed and NO desire to do this or even think about doing it.)

Today, Gannon woke us up with his big smile and big heart.  We started today off exactly like we did THREE years ago, being greeted by such a gift from God. 

Gannon, my life is full of love, hugs, and kisses because of you.  You are a true treasure that I fall more and more in love with daily.  With ALL my heart, Gannon James, I LOVE YOU!

Hugs, Kisses, High Fives, and Knuckles,

Mama



Merry Christmas

I will write in detail about our 2010 Christmas, but tonight I only have one thought on my mind...

I am SO BLESSED to be loved and surrounded by my wonderful boys.



Major Overhaul

I almost forgot I had a blog... So many changes have taken place over the last few months.  Some good, Some not so good.  Of course, the boys are all getting so big. 

Hudsen's Stats: 

• 1st Grade (went to Parent Teacher Conferences, his teacher said he was Perfect- umm...?)
• We now come home and do homework and study spelling words.  Where did my baby go?
• Playing Flag Football.  He moved up a division and is not sure he likes playing against bigger boys.
• Attitude, oh my! 
• In charge of cleaning his room.  I love this one. 
• Hudsen is going to be Iron Man for Halloween, can't seem to break away from that Super Hero Theme.

Gannon's Stats

• 2 years old (almost 3)
• Talking and telling on his brothers all day long
• He loves anything to do with the Farm.  He carries combines, tractors, and grain bins wherever he goes.  He sleeps with an entire farm in his bed.
• He thinks the world of his older brother, and well, he still is not sure about the younger one.
• Gannon is going to be a little monster for Halloween.  Very fitting

Ryker's Stats

• My baby is 1.
• Walking everywhere, Climbing on everything.  He fell off the kitchen table today. 
• Ryker does not talk much with his voice, but he can tell you a thousand stories with his eyes. 
• Ryker is going to be a Skeleton for Halloween.

I am sure there are many more activities that these 3 are doing, but I don't have time to type them all down.  As I type, I hear screaming outside.  Crying from somewhere in this house and Daddy yelling NO.  Not sure what is going on, but I am glad I am in my little room of the house right now.

I decided to follow my heart this summer, and I resigned from my Elementary Teaching job in Hooker.  I went out on a limb and decided to go "home".  I took a job in Texhoma as the High School Computer Teacher.  I love working with computers and this has been a great job!  We did not move, so I get up really early every morning and drive to work.  This is not as bad as I thought.  There are very few people on the road at 6:45 am and I have a chance to just think, relax, and drink my coffee before beginning my day.  I really do miss seeing the boys in the morning, it has always been my favorite part of their day.  I am very lucky because I have a great boss that lets me leave at 2 so that I can be home to pick them up from school.  I have loved picking them up outside after school.  As Hudsen says "I am a real mom now".  I have found myself not being as annoyed with them after work as I was in the past.  I think not working with young children all day and coming home to more young children helps more than I thought it would. 

Levi is still loving his job as a Trooper.  This job has allowed him to have "Daddy's Daycare"  three times a week.  He stays home with Gannon and Ryker while I go to work.  This makes it a little easier working so far away.  His nerves are a little shot by 3:30, but it has been great for the boys.

Levi and I have even managed a little getaway this month.  We left the boys with my parents and went to the Balloon Festival in New Mexico.  What a wonderful trip.  Very relaxing and the show was beautiful, just as I remembered it being. 

The big TTU vs OSU game was next.  And well, the Red and Black were very disappointing. 

Levi and I have also had to deal with the loss of two of our Grandparents the last few months.  First, after a very full loving life, my Papa Rex left this world.  He was a fighter and he has been greatly missed since his passing.  It is hard to believe that my Grandparent's are gone.  I miss them greatly.  Levi's Granny passed away a couple weeks ago.  She too was such a fighter.  She was stronger than anyone thought.  She was able to show each of us how much she loved us with her eyes, and her wonderful hugs.  She too is very missed.  I have been thinking a lot about life since these passing, and the one thing both these wonderful people had in common was the way they "showed" their love.  I say that I love people, but I have been wondering how I show my love.  Several stories were told about each of these people being kind and giving of their time and selves.  What wonderful examples we have in our lives if we just stop for a minute and watch.

This post should last me for the next couple months.



SUMMER!

WooHoo it's SUMMER!  Can't wait to spend the next few months with my 3-4 favorite guys.  Little League is in full swing.  Games start this week and so we will be busy busy busy!  I am so excited.  Hudsen has been practicing and is ready for another season of T-ball.  Well not excited about playing t-ball again, he thinks he is too old, but he is excited to be out at the field with all his friends.  I love watching him play, he really is great at baseball. 
Gannon, he is wild as ever and has started sneaking out of the fence to go visit the neighbors.  I do recall Hudsen doing the same thing.  Good thing our neighbors are great friends.
Ryker is crawling everywhere.  He has started saying Mama- which I adore.  He is playing with the boys more and more everyday.  I can't believe how big he is getting.  He is almost wearing the same size clothes as Gannon.  Poor Gannon.
This summer we will once again try this potty training thing once again.  Gannon has NO desire to even talk about it so I think we are in for a long summer of wet pants and no mamas.
We have already had an exciting start to our summer.  We had 2 fabulous speakers come speak to our kids at the All Sports Banquet.  We had the honor of listening to Andrew McGee and Jessica Lewis give great talks to our kids.  And for me a HUGE Texas Tech fan to say that these 2 OSU athletes were fabulous, well they must have been fabulous.  After the banquet, they stopped by the house to meet Hudsen and they were wonderful with him.  Andrew signed Hud's OSU poster and Hudsen told him all about his "stick" horse, OSU.  I think they got a kick out of the stick horse's name.  Jessica, a member of the OSU track team, was great too.  What a kind, and quite funny lady she is.  I really enjoyed talking to her.  And I never thought I would say this but I can't wait to watch these two OSU athletes do great things.  Not only on the field but in their Christian lives as well.  If you have children, Andrew and Jessica are GREAT role models for our kids.

Mother's Day

Well, do I begin with my mother, her mother, or with me, a mother myself.  Let's start with my Grandma Thelma shall we.  Now let me tell you, this lady was to die for.  Her irresistible laugh, which she always covered up with her hand, brought a smile to my face often.  When she laughed, it was like watching a little girl giggle.  Her smile always contagious and her love unconditional.  Her time was not her own, but belonged to so many of her children and her grandchildren, and even great-grandchildren.  I always knew that we would see my grandmother, either in her chair by her reading lamp or on the second row of a basketball game.  She had to have been an amazing mother because when I see my mother, I see my grandmother.  Oh, and my Mom, what an amazing mom.  Sometimes when my kids are not feeling well, I will rub their heads like my mom did and still does and I wonder if my touch is as comforting as hers.  I wonder if my kids know that no matter what, I will come running when needed.  I hear my Mom was a working Mom, but I never knew it because when needed, wherever needed, she was and is always there.  The comfort and reassurance of my Mom is all I need sometimes to get me through my day.  Which leads me to well, me,  a Mom of three amazing boys.  I write this often but these little guys are truly the greatest gift a Mother could ask for.  As their Mom, I get to see those little smiles brighten up our home.  I get to hear those little giggles from two little boys that should be asleep.  And I get to see my baby learning something new daily.  There is nothing more fulfilling in this world than the voice of a little boy telling me how much they love me.  These guys mean the world to me and I honored to be their Mom. 

• I love my open mouth slobbery kisses from Ryker.

• I love my knuckles, high fives, hugs, and kisses from Gannon.

• I love my To the Stars and Back, Like the Sun Sun Sun, and With All my Heart from Hudsen.

 

I love being Hudsen, Gannon, and Ryker's Mom.

 

So Happy Mother's Day

 

To Valerie (you raised an amazing Son) 

 

To Fonda (you are truly of lady of love)

 

To Tonia (you are a wonderful friend and mother)

 

To Kristi (you teach me daily)

 

AND

 

To MY MOM (there is no one that even touches your place in my heart!)

Dax the Man

http://godlygossips.blogspot.com/

My wonderful outgoing 2 year old nephew has been having several stomach problems.  He has been in and out of the hospital and doctor's offices for the last few months.  Kristi (his mom) was told today that he has celiac disease.  This is a disease that prevents you from eating anything with gluten.  If you research gluten you will see that it is in almost EVERYTHING we eat.  This disease (in a lack of better words, seems to eat away at your intestines if you don't take care of it).  They go to a specialist tomorrow for more tests and options.  I am typing this in hopes that you will pray for Dax and his family.  This is a life changing disease that will be very hard to grow accustomed to.  All prayers will be greatly appreciated by Kristi and Garrett.  If you have a means of getting a prayer request out, please do so.  I know several of you have several friends and family members that can help us pray for them.  Also, she has a blog http://godlygossips.blogspot.com please stop by and leave her a comment, I know she would appreciate it.

I Love Him

All I can say is....What a GREAT man I married!  I LOVE YOU, always and forever babe, always and forever!

Someone's Having a Birthday...

Oh wait, that someone is me... I only write this because 5 years ago, my birthday became much more than My birthday.  Five years ago, I was sitting in a specialist waiting room waiting to find out what exactly was wrong with my firstborn.  Two months prior to this I was told that my baby would be born with down's syndrome and I would need to see a specialist to find out how severe it would be.  So there I was sitting in a waiting room on my birthday holding my stomach and praying to God to PLEASE let my baby be "normal".  My parents, Levi's parents, and Levi were standing outside the waiting room visiting while I sat there.  The longer I sat the more nervous I became and the harder I began to pray.  I watched parents sitting there with their grown children, all with downs, pleading with them to just be still.  I watched as an older father tied the shoe of his now grown child adult.  I turned to see another mother cover her head just wishing her son would stop yelling.  That is when it hit me, what am I going to do if something is wrong with my baby?  How am I going to do this for the rest of my life.  I instantly had two emotions running through my head, selfishness and shame.  Selfishness because I did not want my life to be this way, and shame for thinking that of my unborn baby.  But then in the middle of my prayer-plead to God I heard the sweetest words, Thanks Daddy, Love You-coming from the "shoe child".   The selfishness was gone and the love of my child no matter what the problems, it was mine and I would love him or her no matter what.  But the greatest feeling was that this baby would LOVE ME BACK.  Not to long after that our name was called, they took us into a tiny room to explain what they would be looking for, and our options.  Options, we don't need options.  After our "little conversation" they took us to a larger room and set up the sonogram.  As she moved around, there it was our baby, the greatest birthday gift ever.  There it was, she moved it here and moved it there looking for "markers"  very few words came out of her mouth as she did, then she said it...This is a very HEALTHY little baby.  Oh, tears of joy and love from answered prayers.  Our baby was/is healthy.

So on this day, my birthday, I found out that trusting God, believing that he is in charge, and allowing myself to love unconditionally would be the greatest birthday- life -gift of all.  On this day, five years ago, my birthday would forever be about unconditional love.  This special day will always be the day I found out that I was going to be the Mommy of a beautiful HEALTHY little BOY!

Well believe it or not there is life in the Hill house.  You probably would not have guessed it by my lack of blogging, but we are alive and we are busy.  One of these days when I get a few minutes, I will update this blog.  Know this, the boys are all doing great.  Levi and I are trying to update our bedroom right now.  We hope that one day, we will get to do more than just paint and trim.  I am loving the new color, gray.  I knew if I picked Levi's favorite color, then he would for sure let me do it.  The first mention of gray and he was all for it.  We have also decided to tackle a job that I have been wanting to do for about 7 years now, new baseboards.  First up, our room, then slowly the rest of the house.  I am sure that my husband can't wait for summer to get here so that I will stop starting all these projects for him to finish.  I am going a little crazy, I am not much for cold weather and it seems as though this winter has been extra long, or maybe I have more kids this winter and the house seems a little smaller than in the past.  Whatever the case may be, I am ready for HOT weather.  I promise to get back to this blogging thing once I have a few minutes to myself.

Look Who Turned 2!

I am a little late on this post, BUT he has been on my mind a lot! Gannon James Hill turned 2 years old December 27th. That little bug is growing so fast. It seems like just yesterday I was sitting on my couch 9 months pregnant, trying to open Christmas gifts. My belly was HUGE and I was miserable. As the snow fell on that very cold morning, Levi and I drove to the hospital (icy roads!!!) once again to welcome another baby boy. This little guy took forever to get here, but once he did, of course love at first sight. I remember holding him and looking out the window at the most beautiful winter scene. Snow covered everything and the flakes were huge. I held that little guy and together we were one and warm.

Fast forward through 2 RSV hospital stays and lots of bumps, falls, Popsicle sticks and we are here, 2 years later. My little guy is growing up way to fast. He is now trying to talk in sentences, which I understand. And just like that, he is crawling OUT of his crib. He never attempted this before, but it's like, hey, I am 2 I think I will start crawling out of this thing. And so I debate, should I keep him in there and just get up and put him back, or should I take down the crib and let him sleep in a big boy bed. YIKES! a big boy bed! NO!!!

I so love watching my boys grow up and each new stage brings lots of new things that I love. Can't wait to see what Gannon has in store for us this year! Happy Birthday Gannon James!

Today He is 4 Months Old!

It amazes me how slow the last few months of pregnancy are. The excitement, the tiredness, and the anticipation of the arrival of a new baby. The months slowly tick by, counting months turns into counting weeks, which soon turns into counting days. BUT then you have the bundle of joy and you finally get a chance to look up and BAM...he is now 4 months old. WHAT? 4 months? NO, surely that can't be, it was just yesterday that I brought him home from the hospital. Man, where did the last few months go? What has happened to time standing still? This can't be, he can't be 4 months old...then I look over and that tiny 6 lb baby I brought home is now sitting in his Bumbo chair watching his brothers play. What is that I hear, he is laughing at them. He can't be old enough to just laugh at those crazy brothers. But why does this surprise me, as I am looking at those 2 crazy brothers, I begin to realize, that when you blink, one is in school and the other is turning 2 (more on that little big guy in days to come). Just a few things to know about this 4 month old. Ryker is...

• Rolling over


• Sleeping through the night!!!!! 4 stars from MOM on this one!


• Eating at least 6-7 oz at each feeding.


• Laughing at anyone that looks at him


• Extremely ticklish


• Grabs anything in arms reach- straight to the mouth


• Starting to coo- love this one.

Well, happy 4 Months Old Ryker Sutton. Mommy loves you! Can't wait for more NEW things!

Love you,

Mommy

Merry Christmas

Wishing each of you a Merry Christmas and a Very Safe and Happy New Year!